I am loss....I was lost.... (27/10/2009)

When a flower blooms on a barren land fertilized with pain...
It brings forth not happiness but emotional gain...
Feeling of being intoxicately numb...
Such a strange numb... and it brings my knees to the earth
I feel I am more of healing to be able to release the bad blood
as bleeding of my soul to cleanse my inner self...

To free my emotions that have too long internally dwell,
what I have live on a deeper unreachable level perhaps....
Many times I even feel invisible not being able to attach myself with this world....
In-depth of my heart live in quiet, lonely,monotoneous, boring, desperation...
I am loss..... I was lost


There's something that is missing in my life perhaps....
I feel a sense unfulfillment.....just like everyone else that have gone through....
I am awaiting... my glimpse of light......